Obituary

Two Buttons presented a man with a red button and a blue button, one labeled with something you want and one labeled with the cost of wanting it: 'Press the button and get $1 million' / 'Press the button and a random meme dies.' It was the internet's favorite moral philosophy: the trolley problem, but with snacks. It died in 2016 when every possible pairing had been made, leaving the poor man frozen at the console, hand hovering, for eternity. He never pressed either button. He is still deciding.

Born

2015

Died

2016

Cause of death

Died of indecision

Last sighting

An archived decision, 2016

Resting place

Section B, Row 2

Category

comic